Change The Lens

We typically view our parents/caregivers through a subjective lens.

As a child, my parents were superheroes. During my teenage years, they knew nothing. Once I reached adulthood, I went through a judgemental phase. I wondered about the choices they made and the “why’s” behind it.

No matter what my parents did, they were doomed. My experiences with them shaped who they were in my eyes.

A few years back, I interviewed my parents individually. I wanted to learn more about their backgrounds and experiences. I so appreciated their transparency and willingness to share themselves with me as they did. It was then that God whispered, “See my child; they are human, like you.” For the first time ever, I saw them as children of God. From that point on, I was able to love and accept them for who they were.

We all have flaws and baggage; some weigh heavier than others. Resentment and unforgiveness reside in our hearts. We drown in the memories of our past, not able to swim freely toward the future. But we don’t have to remain in these places.

The question is, how do we move forward?

• Pray for a softening of the heart and the willingness to forgive. Ask God to see them through His eyes.

• What’s their story? Ask them questions. If you are not comfortable with that, ask people who know/knew them.

• And remember, they are broken people like you and me.

This doesn’t mean that whatever has happened to you is okay; it just means that you are choosing to let go of it and hand it over to God, so you can move forward. Don’t let your past define your future. You can be set free.

What steps can you take today to change your lens?