We all have that one person (or more) who gets on our last nerve during holiday gatherings. Whether it’s due to family dynamics, different values, communication styles, or overall holiday pressures and expectations, they irk us. Once a year, for the greater good, we are expected to tolerate them.
What if we changed things up and didn’t just tolerate them but were purposefully present with meaningful engagement? You might think there is no way in **** I can do that, but I beg to differ.
Here are some strategies to use when peeps start getting under your skin:
Look at this person as an image bearer like you. Acknowledging human brokenness puts everyone on a level playing field and adjusts your perceptions of them.
Be curious. We all have a personal story; get to know theirs. Even if you know them well, there might still be stuff going on in their lives you’re unaware of. Approaching them intentionally with active listening might help to lessen the annoyance and increase compassion.
Serve them physically and emotionally.
- Ask if they need anything throughout the day/evening. If they have an empty cup, offer to refill it.
- If they drink too much or say something stupid, give them grace. The previous step of getting to know them will hopefully change your attitude and approach to their behaviors.
Remember, we’ve been saved by grace that we didn’t deserve, so we, too, should shell out some grace, even when we don’t want to.
Prayer
God, let your Holy Spirit fill us this holiday season. Help us be purposeful and intentional in thought, speech, and action, extending grace to others, especially when not feeling it. Thank you for the grace you’ve given through your Son, Jesus. Amen!
Merry Christmas and a blessed New Year. Much love