Tag: love

Attitude, Love, Uncategorized

Someone Else’s Shoes

Jaime

I recently watched the movie “Freaky Friday” (2003 version) with my daughter. A mother and daughter switch bodies after eating a magical fortune cookie, experiencing what it’s like to walk in the other’s shoes.

To switch back, they need to understand and empathize with the other.

As I remain quarantined in my house with family, toilet paper, food, and technology, I can’t help but think of those who don’t have these luxuries (never thought tp was a luxury, but now I do).

The population on my heart today are those in prison, specifically in isolation. I know there are reasons as to why they are in those situations, yet, I feel for them as fellow human beings.

We are all experiencing the realities of this crisis in different ways. My prayer is for us to remain grateful, keeping our eyes focused on God and how He wants to use us in this time of struggle.

Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.

John 13:35 NLT
Attitude, Love, Thought Life

I Lust You

Jaime

Love:

-an intense feeling of deep affection.

-a great interest and pleasure in something.

Lust:

– to have an intense sexual desire or need.

– an intense longing.

I’ve been “in lust” many times, often thinking it was love. All my lustful thoughts and feelings started with the phrase “I want.” Once I met the man who would eventually become my husband, the “I want” sentiment remained. Wasn’t there supposed to be a difference between the two?

Both definitions (received from Google and Merriam-Webster Dictionary) appear to be all about me. My desires, my needs, my interests, my pleasure.

No wonder my relationships didn’t work!

If my needs weren’t met, I’d leave. If I was no longer physically attracted to my partner, it was over (I was quite shallow and still can be). The interesting thing; the world encouraged this.

God flips the script, telling us that love is not self-serving, but quite the opposite. It’s about sacrifice and service. It’s not a feeling. It’s a choice. I have to choose my husband each day. Sometimes it’s a piece of cake, others, not so much.

When my feelings and thoughts communicate something different than the truth of God’s Word and His definition of love, I know it ain’t right. My part; commitment, willingness, selflessness (ouch), honesty, vulnerability, and last but not least, seeking love from the source Himself.

How do you know the difference between lust and love?

Love

Love Don’t Cost A Thing

Jaime

Have you ever heard the song “Love Don’t Cost A Thing?” I’m singing it as I write this. As much as I like the song, it’s just not true.

A newly married couple finds out the wife has cancer. Instead of enjoying their new life together, hubby takes a leave of absence at work to care for his sick wife.

“Love Don’t Cost A Thing.”

A single mother works three jobs to support her children. She hardly sees them due to providing for their basic needs.

“Love Don’t Cost A Thing.”

A young girl has sex for the first time. She thought her boyfriend loved her. Soon after, the boyfriend dumps her and is with someone else.

“Love Don’t Cost A Thing.”

A man is stripped naked, beaten beyond recognition, humiliated, and nailed to a cross. Why?

Because he loves us.

And…

LOVE COST HIM EVERYTHING.

Who in your life has sacrificed for you? In what ways can you show appreciation to them?

Attitude, Identity, Thought Life

It’s Not Me, It’s Them

Jaime

The world is full of broken people. I’m one of them.

Genocide, Human Trafficking, Homelessness, Politics. Watching the news for any length of time shows this reality. It’s easy to point fingers and blame others for the condition of our world, but do we ever think about our contribution?

“But I’m a good person,” I’d tell myself as I stole money from dad’s wallet. “If I didn’t have this drug habit, I wouldn’t be doing this.”

“But I’m a good person,” I’d reason while fooling around with someone’s boyfriend. “I’m deserving of love and attention too.”

“And anyway, I volunteer at a crisis center and work in a group home, so it balances things out. It’s not like I’m hurting anybody.” Talk about a screwy way of thinking.

Being so focused on my needs and desires, I genuinely convinced myself that my choices didn’t affect others. Isn’t this what we do? We rationalize and justify our behaviors and decisions.

This post is not meant to elicit feelings of guilt or shame but rather to encourage an honest look at our part in things. Our perceptions, assumptions, past experiences, egos, pride, and lots of other things drive our choices. 

“We” are not the problem, but the truth is, we all contribute to the brokenness of this world. The harsh reality is that this world is getting worse, but we, as individuals and disciples of Christ, are called to be a light in the broken places. 

How?

  • Be humble (talking to myself here). We don’t always need to be right.
  • Be respectful, regardless of others’ opinions or beliefs.
  • Self-Inventory. Keep track of your thoughts. Where do they come from? How are they steering your decisions (even in the little things)?
  • Keep your side of the street clean. Regardless of what anyone else is doing or saying, do what God is calling you to do or be.
  • Love Hard! It’s not easy but needed.
  • Keep your eyes fixed on what’s to come. This is not the finale.

Would you pray with me?

Lord, please help us by shining a light into the dark places of our minds and hearts. Use us as you please for your purposes, until you come back and fix all brokenness once and for all. Amen.

Attitude

Don’t Be A Turkey

Jaime

A turkey sits on a platter at the dining room table, surrounded by yummy side dishes.

“I just love being the center of attention,” says turkey. “You side dishes would be nothing without me.”

“You look marvelous,” mashed potatoes whispers softly to sweet potatoes.

“Why, thank you. The marshmallows really bring out my sweetness.”

“Really?” gobbles turkey. “You know that you are competing against each other, being that you are both potatoes?”

“I hope I get to sit next to stuffing today,” green beans crunches excitedly.

“That’s nice of you to say string beans,”stuffing humbly replies. “I’m a little crispy this time around, so that fluffed me up a bit.”

“She’s coming!” jiggles the cranberry sauce.

The host picks up the platter of turkey and disappears into another room. “So long suckers,” says turkey on it’s way out.

“Why is the turkey so mean?” gurgles the gravy. “He never acknowledges me.”

The family starts to gather around the table when a loud crash from the kitchen distracts them. “Everything okay in there?” someone asks.

The host reappears empty-handed, wearing a long face. “I dropped the turkey.”

“Lucky for us, we have ham.” One of the guests comes alongside the host with a beautifully cooked ham.

“Yay!” the side dishes cheer. “We love ham!”

Don’t be a turkey.

Attitude

Change The Lens

Jaime

We typically view our parents/caregivers through a subjective lens.

As a child, my parents were superheroes. During my teenage years, they knew nothing. Once I reached adulthood, I went through a judgemental phase. I wondered about the choices they made and the “why’s” behind it.

No matter what my parents did, they were doomed. My experiences with them shaped who they were in my eyes.

A few years back, I interviewed my parents individually. I wanted to learn more about their backgrounds and experiences. I so appreciated their transparency and willingness to share themselves with me as they did. It was then that God whispered, “See my child; they are human, like you.” For the first time ever, I saw them as children of God. From that point on, I was able to love and accept them for who they were.

We all have flaws and baggage; some weigh heavier than others. Resentment and unforgiveness reside in our hearts. We drown in the memories of our past, not able to swim freely toward the future. But we don’t have to remain in these places.

The question is, how do we move forward?

  • Pray for a softening of the heart and the willingness to forgive. Ask God to see them through His eyes.
  • What’s their story? Ask them questions. If you are not comfortable with that, ask people who know/knew them.
  • And remember, they are broken people like you and me.

This doesn’t mean that whatever has happened to you is okay; it just means that you are choosing to let go of it and hand it over to God, so you can move forward. Don’t let your past define your future. You can be set free.

What steps can you take today to change your lens?

Uncategorized

I’ve Got Plans

Jaime

Have you ever had plans for your life that ended up not working out?

My plan as a young girl was to be a singer/actress. My summers involved musicals and rock bands. I loved being on stage and in the spotlight.

An opportunity arose when I was 15 years old. I had the chance to attend a prestigious camp to further my skills and career. My parents signed me up and I was ready to go.

And…

Then I met a boy, “fell in love,” and decided to skip camp to hang out with him. We broke up a few years later.

This changed the trajectory of my life.

I’d sometimes wonder what things would’ve been like if I had gone to that camp.

That wasn’t the plan for my life.

We tend to make plans according to our desires and needs; “I want… I want to be…” Sometimes we make plans based on what others desire for us. Mom might encourage marriage to a specific person. Dad wants you to take over the family business. We are blinded by our fleshly desires, so much so that we forget to consult with God about his plans for our lives.

God gives us freedom of choice. My choices may have put me on an alternate route, but God’s will prevailed.

Have you recently made a decision or plan that didn’t pan out? We’ve all been there. Here are some things that might help:

  • Surrender your will (if this is a struggle for you, pray for the desire to do so)
  • Pray for wisdom for your future and choices
  • Be aware of his presence and promptings
  • Trust that God’s plans are better than yours

What plans in your life turned out differently than you thought they would?

Attitude, Identity, LGBTQ

I See You

Jaime

Dear Fellow Females,

I don’t know you, but I love you.

How can I love you if I haven’t met you? Easy, because God loves me. He loves me in spite of everything I’ve done (and girl, I’ve done a lot).

Now that I know this love it’s my responsibility to love you. Not in a conditional way, but all of you. This doesn’t mean that I will affirm everything you do, but it does mean that I see you and accept you as a person.

If anyone has ever made you feel less than, I’m sorry.

If anyone has ever labeled you, I’m sorry.

If anyone has ever spit harmful words at you, I’m sorry.

Please hear me when I say: YOU are God’s Masterpiece (microphone drop).

You are beautiful, one of a kind, amazing, loved, cared about, special, worth dying for.

I’ve felt less than. I’ve been labeled. Harmful words have penetrated my soul. I wouldn’t wish that on anyone. So I’m reaching out… to you.

I don’t know your story, but if you’d like to share it with me, I’m here.