Dependence on God, Identity, Support

Why Do We Suffer Alone?

After church on Sunday, I stayed for prayer. I was struggling. After praying with a sister in Christ, we started chatting. She, too, suffers like I do. We discussed how easy it is to talk about the minor, everyday transgressions but not the deep, dark stuff. The stuff that keeps us enslaved, preventing us from living in the freedom Jesus provided. 

So, why IS it so hard to talk about these things?

Fear

Fear of judgment

Fear of embarrassment

Fear of not being accepted

If anyone ever knew_____ then_____ (fill in the blanks).

We are called to confess our sins and pray for each other that we may be healed (James 5:16), yet we still fear what others will think about us. Your feelings are legit. We are human and DO have opinions and feelings about situations and behaviors we are unfamiliar with. And, we need to put our fleshly biases aside and be open to hearing people’s stories, walking alongside them, even if/when we don’t understand.

Sins kept in the darkness result in decay, isolation, shame, and guilt. All things Jesus died for. When we expose them to the light, they begin to lose their power (Romans 6:18).

Where do we start?

God

-Repent and thank HIM for the forgiveness already given through Jesus’ sacrifice.

-Ask God to give you the courage to expose your “stuff” to the light. Stop relying on yourself and ask for help. 

-Pray for trustworthy, faith-filled, walking-the-walk-type individuals to come into your life (an individual/mentor or group).

-Join a small group. If you can’t find one, start one.

-Don’t give in when the enemy tries to convince you to keep it a secret (whatever IT is) because he will. He’s a liar and doesn’t want you moving closer to God.

-Don’t allow your feelings to lead the way. Obedience to God’s word will not lead you astray (be doers of the word and not just hearers- James 1:22).

You’d be surprised how many others relate and share in your suffering. It only takes one person’s vulnerability to create an environment of safety and connection.

What is one thing you can do today to move towards the light?

Attitude, Thought Life

What If?

I recently watched the movie “The Way Back.” A man struggling with alcoholism gets an opportunity to coach a boy’s basketball team, leading him on a path of recovery and healing.

The first part would have you believe that his addiction ruined his life, but as the story unfolds, you learn that one year prior, his 10-year-old son died of cancer.

“No wonder he’s drinking like he is,” I said to myself, my initial judgment switching to empathy.

First impressions are usually the tip of the iceberg. Our hurts, hang-ups, and baggage are what floats beneath the surface. There is a reason people are the way they are.

It’s unrealistic for us to get to know everyone’s story, but there is a way to incorporate empathy for others. Want to know how?

By asking the question, “what if?”

The next time you find yourself having an opinion about someone (we all do), ask yourself some questions:

What if her husband died in a car accident?

What if their dad used to beat them?

What if he was recently diagnosed with stage 4 cancer?

You get it, right?

Do you have any thoughts on what might help increase empathy towards others?